Welcome to The Problem Under the Table, a humorous and surprising play about fear, imagination, and the unexpected places where solutions can come from. In this story, we meet Bruce, a nervous man who is terrified of eating at his dinner table because he believes someone is hiding underneath it. Desperate for help, he visits the best psychiatrist in town, Dr. Lier, who assures him that treatment will take time—and a lot of money. But when the medical secretary hears Bruce’s problem, she offers a simple idea that changes everything in an instant. This fun and lighthearted play reminds us that fear can make us believe incredible things, and that sometimes the answer is much simpler than we think.
CHARACTERS:
MEDICAL SECRETARY
BRUCE
DR. LIER
SCRIPT:
(Bruce is at the doctor’s office reception area. He’s shifting in his chair nervously. He looks around the office nervously. His lips are moving as if he is taking deep breaths in and out. He sees the coffee table, he stands, takes the table, and moves it away from him)
MEDICAL SECRETARY: Mr. Tea? The doctor is ready for you now.
BRUCE: (Standing abruptly, goes to the reception desk) Yes, that’s me.
MEDICAL SECRETARY: You may go in.
BRUCE: Thanks.
(He enters the doctor’s office. The doctor is at his desk)
DOCTOR LIER: Good afternoon, Mr. Tea. Please, come in.
BRUCE: Good afternoon, doctor.
DOCTOR LIER: Please sit down. (Bruce sits) What can I do for you?
BRUCE: (nervously, leaning forward) Doctor, I have a serious problem, and I’m honestly terrified. I don’t know what to do!
DOCTOR LIER: Tell me what’s wrong.
BRUCE: I can’t eat anything, doctor.
DOCTOR LIER: Is it a physical issue? Are you having trouble chewing or swallowing?
BRUCE: None. I can’t eat at my dinner table. That’s the problem…the table!
DOCTOR LIER: What’s wrong with your table?
BRUCE: Every single time I try to sit down to eat, the thought pops into my head that a person is hiding under my table. I am genuinely terrified… It’s driving me mad.
DOCTOR LIER: Mmmm…
BRUCE: What’s wrong with me, doctor?
DOCTOR LIER: Right now, I can’t give you a diagnosis. I’ll have to run some tests, and after that, you will begin your treatment.
BRUCE: How long will it take me to get well?
DOCTOR LIER: That depends on you. You must keep in mind that psychotherapy is a long-term process, so don’t expect any instant solutions to your problem. BUT, if you come to therapy twice a week, I can reassure you that in approximately six months, you will be cured.
BRUCE: And will I be able to eat at my table without being scared?
DOCTOR LIER: Of course! All your fears and phobias will disappear. But I must tell you that if you interrupt your treatment, you will not see any improvement in your symptoms. Is that clear?
BRUCE: Yes, I understand. When can I start?
DOCTOR LIER: Come tomorrow morning to take some psychological tests. It is important to assess the presence of certain conditions…
BRUCE: Do you mean… like schizophrenia?
DOCTOR LIER: Oh no. I’m talking about depression, anxiety, anger control, or stress.
BRUCE: So, what is the cost for these initial tests?
DOCTOR LIER: The psychological assessment is three hundred dollars.
BRUCE: Oh my God…that’s a lot of money!
DOCTOR LIER: Do you want to get well…yes or no?
BRUCE: Yes, I do. I was saving some money to buy a new car, but I prefer to invest it in my mental health.
DOCTOR LIER: I commend your decision. The ongoing weekly fee for two therapy sessions is $200.
BRUCE: Two hundred dollars for two sessions a week? That’s a hundred dollars per session!
DOCTOR LIER: That’s right. You’re good at Math!
BRUCE: How long do therapy sessions last?
DOCTOR LIER: Fifty minutes.
BRUCE: That’s not even an hour, doctor…but I’ll be here tomorrow.
DOCTOR LIER: (he stands) Very well, Mr. Tea. Now, please go with my secretary. She will schedule your appointment.
BRUCE: (he stands) Thank you very much…see you tomorrow. (he leaves the doctor’s office, approaches the secretary, and takes out his wallet.) How much is it?
MEDICAL SECRETARY: A hundred dollars.
BRUCE: A hundred dollars for ten minutes? That’s my whole week’s wage!
MEDICAL SECRETARY: Dr. Lier is the best psychiatrist in town…
BRUCE: (yelling) I know that’s why I’m here!
MEDICAL SECRETARY: You don’t have to yell at me.
BRUCE: (he gives her the money.) Here’s the money.
MEDICAL SECRETARY: Do you need a receipt?
BRUCE: Ha, ha, ha …. A receipt is the last thing I need right now. If I knew how much it would cost me to be afraid of eating at my dinner table just because I thought someone under it was going to come out and get me…I wouldn’t have come to see the doctor…or better yet…I would have let him take me away and devour me!
MEDICAL SECRETARY: Wait, that’s your ‘serious problem?’ Are you afraid of your dinner table? I can’t believe it!
BRUCE: It’s easy for you to say. I have been starving for days, and I haven’t been able to sleep at night because I’m always hungry. But tell me…what would you do in my place?
MEDICAL SECRETARY: Me? I’d just take a saw to the legs!
BRUCE: (A stunned silence, then shouts with joy) You’ve solved it! You’ve solved my problem! Thank you! I’m cured! I’ve just saved myself thousands of dollars… I’m going car shopping!
MEDICAL SECRETARY: Hey, wait! What about tomorrow’s appointment?
BRUCE: I won’t be coming. Tell the doctor I’m cured!
(He leaves the scene/room)
MEDICAL SECRETARY: Oh, no…another patient who cancels psychotherapy sessions because of my big mouth. I hope Dr. Lier never finds out!
In the end, Bruce discovers that the solution to his fear wasn’t complicated or expensive—it came from an unexpected moment of common sense. Instead of months of therapy and high costs, one simple suggestion helped him face his fear and finally enjoy a meal again. The Problem Under the Table shows us that sometimes we worry ourselves into believing our fears are bigger than they truly are. With a bit of logic, courage, and creativity, even the scariest problems can be solved more easily than we imagine.
The End
Author: K I D S I N C O
Moral of the Story: Sometimes fear makes our problems seem bigger than they are. A little courage and clear thinking can reveal simple solutions.
Moral Values:
- Courage: Facing fears, even when they seem irrational or overwhelming.
- Common Sense: Looking for practical solutions before assuming the worst.
- Perspective: Understanding that worries can grow when we let them.
- Responsibility: Seeking help when needed—but also learning to evaluate situations thoughtfully.
- Gratitude: Appreciating the simple advice and help that others offer.
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